Date like a woman think like a man book review

I have just skim read the book ‘Date like a woman think like a man’ by Steve Harvey. It could be considered ‘The Game’ for women. In that case, I believe it could be considered a good thing. However, I don’t think it would actually work. Now, if you were to actually write the game when for women, it would be a really short book. It would go something like this “marry young, lose weight, be affectionate“. This however would not sell and would not get a huge film deal. So this book has been padded at and am filled with crap. Some of it would actually work. However, there are some basic problems with the methods involved.

Main concept: use of affection as a tool to get the men to do things that you want him to do (primarily to commit).

One of the main concepts of the book is that women give up sex too easily, and therefore men are not willing to work for it. Now this kind of sounds like the same PUA concept of getting a woman to invest and therefore be more committed to you. Sometimes this will work. Its a pretty well-known fact that once a man has slept with a woman the first time his motivation to do it again is considerably lower. It’s like there is this very special kind of novel value to the first time you sleep with a woman.

However in practice, I don’t think this will work as well as is suggested. The problem is value. A relationship will only last if both partners have a similar value and no amount of withholding sex or affection is actually going to raise a woman’s value. Actually it is more likely to lower it since the man will find her cold and calculating.

This approach works primarily as a filtering method, rather than a method of raising your value. For example, one of the main premises in the book is the you should make a man wait 90 days before sleeping him. Now if a man does wait 90 days he defiantly commit, but the chances are he has no other options (chances are, he probably wouldn’t get laid in 90 days anyway). However high value men (you know the men women actually want to commit to them) are going to have other women who will sleep with him. So she going to lose her chance at wooing him.

This process would actually work to help a woman get commitment, but the way it works is by lowering the women’s standards. She would no longer be dating the players who are never going to settle down with her so she wouldn’t be wasting her time on them. However, she also wouldn’t have the shot at impressing the higher value guys who are looking for commitment. What this system has effectively done has filtered out all of the good guys and left her with a low value men, who would be desperate to commit. Seeing as most women overvalue themselves in the dating market. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it also isn’t the fairy tale the book is selling. They might as well, just bring out a book that says start dating ugly, poor and unconfident men. This would have the same effect.

To make the comparison to the PUA teaching again, this is the same as suggesting he learns all the tricks to fake value without actually putting any work in to improve himself. So learning things like pickup lines, negs and so on. Without actually learning how to improve themselves, or learn how to make a woman happy. These types of PUAs who can sleep with a really hot women but can never have a relationship with one.

Online dating versus PUA training

Reasons you should go to a Fetish club!

Okay this blog talks a lot about how to become better at dating coming from the self improvement ‘becoming an alpha male’ point of view. This is something that might seem a little bit outside that remit, but stick with me.  I think all men at some point in their lives should go to a fetish club and I have a lot of good reasons.

1. It will completely destroy any nagging preconception that women don’t like sex!

Standard dating is based around the idea that men are the pursuers and women are the pursued. Most men start out with the concept that  men want sex and women don’t. This is starting to change a bit, but still as a young guy in the back of your head you think that men desire sex more than women. Usually most men who manage to lose this mind set is the kind of guy who has slept with a lot of beautiful women.  The PUA method of flipping the script is based around this, letting the women chase you. But to do this and be congruent with it, you need to understand that women want sex too, big time. The only difference is women are biologically programmed to only want it  from the best men possible, men are biology programmed to want it from every fertile looking women.

The reason why a fetish club does this better than anywhere else is because you experience it. It is completely accepted to everyone there. It is sooo in your face that after a couple of hours you would be completely acclimatized to it. You will be standing around chatting the most filthy acts, like you we’re talking about filling out your taxes.

2. Damm the women are hot.

This is what the average women look like in a normal club:

This is what the average women looks like in good quality fetish club:

Or like this:

Seriously that is what most women look like. The reason being, you don’t get let in if your not prepared to wear something like that and if you don’t think you can pull it off you simple don’t go. You don’t have girl throwing their birthdays parties at fetish clubs, because 90% of their mate wouldn’t have the guts to come, primarily because they have to be that confident in their looks to pull this stuff off. Okay admittable these are models from Clairesville Boudoir Photoshoot in Birmingham  (Thanks for letting me use the picture girls love your stuff).

But believe me the standard is so much higher. (The exception here are the hard core play clubs, they tend to be more varied because it’s about the play more than the look).

3. People can be much more open about their preferences.

In normal clubbing, dating, sarging whatever. It’s strange to talk about sex, on first meeting people. Usually you have to work your way up about it. Some couple have been dating for years and never really talked about their sexual preference since it a bit of a weird conversation.

But at fetish clubs it’s easy. This drops one of the biggest taboos, 90% of women want to be dominated. 90% of women are turned on by a dominate man. Just look at the record sales of the 50 shades of grey (it’s a rip off of Story of O). The vast majority of women are turned on by a dominate male. In a normal club, this is taboo, women would blush push you away, call their protector males, if you try and be too dominate (Unless you have got really good game and can pull it off). In a fetish club you can straight out ask the women what they want and as long as it consensual you can do usually do it there and then.

Some of the stuff is breath taking.

4. It desensitizes you to beautiful naked women

Sex can be a nerve racking thing, especially if the women is hot. The two most common reason men fail to perform well in the sack is because the get to excited and cum too quickly or they get nervous and your sympathetic nervous system put you in fight or flight mode and as Wikipedia puts it:

The stress response halts or slows down various processes such as sexual responses and digestive systems to focus on the stressor situation and typically causes negative effects like constipation,anorexia, erectile dysfunction, difficulty urinating, and difficulty maintaining sexual arousal.

Simply put being in bed with a incredible beautiful women can make it hard to get a hard on if you are not used to it.

Where in this day and age do you get to stand around and chat with tons of near naked beautiful women (common outfit consist of just a mask to hide the women identify). If your regularly invited to the playboy mansion then that fine but most of us aren’t. The only other place I can think of is strip clubs, but to me the point that the women are being placed on such a pedestal is mentally quite an unhealthy thing.

5. People are so much nicer than normal clubs

Seriously people at fetish club are some of the nicest people you’ll meet. In normal club any idiot can get in, all the men are usually acting super macho to impress women. Fetish clubs are completely different, there is a feeling of acceptance and that the bar has been raise.  The people who come are usually pretty well educated, interesting unconfirmists, who all know their is quite a high level of trust required for you to be there.

Also the because the people tend to be more confident and people have stuff to talk about, people don’t feel the need to get blind drunk.

There are a lot of different type of fetish clubs, they all vary in the kind of night. I’m lucky enough to live in London so I have a pick of a lot of interesting night, their tend to vary from night like Torture garden which is much more about the clothes, to the kinky saloon which is more about fun sort of arts and craft  to some of the more extreme cubs that are based around play (i.e. more hard core bondage and S&M stuff like Decedence.

If you don’t know anyone to go with their are informal social meetup to introduce newbie to the scene called munches all over the world, join up at fet life (sort of fetish Facebook)  to find one close to you.

Any questions just drop a comment.

Tally peacocking like a twat

Hey you PUA Mystery method disciples out their have you run out of big furry hats, Gothic jewelry and patch work pants? Need something to out peacock the rest f the guys in the bar? Why not try Tally, the motorized tail which reacts to your heart beat to tell everyone how excited you are?

Check out the video here

This will definitely get people opening you. Because women love a man that dresses like a twat.

Dating Advice, The Makeshift Alpha Dating clinic!

Getting actually useful dating advice is not easy. Ask your friends, they’ll say whatever will cheer you up. Magazines pump out vague generalities to appeal to the largest readership possible and real world specialist that are worth a damn are rare to say the least. This is where Dr Makeshift comes in.

I’m going to do a clinic (well at least until I’m bored of it). If you take the time to fill out what is a pretty hefty survey, I will give you a honest no holes barred appraisal of your situation plus advice on what your best options are.

Why should you listen to me?

1. I’m remaining anonymous: My decision to remain anonymous gives me a lot of benefits. But the main benefit to you is I don’t have to worry about offending you, I can afford to be completely honest. I don’t need to sugar coat anything, I don’t need to worry about you screaming at me, threats of violence, so on. No real world ramification for me. Useful honest information for you.
2. You remain anonymous: Unless you specifically want to be associated with this, I’m not going to out you. Their is no reason for me to, you can check back through all the case files to see that I’m honest to my word.
3. My diagnosis is open to public scrutiny: I’m going to write a post about your situation, along with my advice. If people consider it rubbish, they can comment, Google note me, write a blog post having a go, whatever. I rarely moderate my comments, occasionally I will if I think they add nothing.
4. I’m not trying to up sell you anything:  Presently I’m doing this mainly for my own benefit and to generate interesting content. I might add some thing in the future but not at the moment. I don’t want to sell you extra counseling session, make sure you subscribe or anything. That might change. But to be honest if I think you need to see a psychologist, that going to be the first thing I say. Heck I’m not even charging for the service at all at the moment. I might add in some queue jumping options in exchange for a donation.

Wow!
First off I want to thank you for taking that amount of time and effort to really analyse my profile, obviously I’m grateful for ANY feedback but you really went the extra mile. thanks 🙂

Don – Wales

What qualifies me to give you advice?

I could say a number of things here. A lot of personal experience, my study of psychology and evolutionary biology, the point I have been active in the PUA scene for years, my need for testing, my adherence to logic and what I believe is a relatively clean lens that I see the world through. Also I did this for quite a while for a popular internet dating site.

But all this is highly subjective. I urge you to make your mind up for yourself. My writings are clear here, if you think what I say make sense then give me a shot, if you think I sound like a mad man then please don’t waste my time. Even though I have chosen to keep my identity private, my thought processes and opinions are far from it.

Go on you know you want to! What’s the worst that can happen.

Makeshift is right and he gave a good critique and I agree with him.

– Lioness

Thanks for all the advice, I’ll get to editing now!
Would you mind having another look when I’ve finished?

Shelley – Bristol

Snake skin Re framing my inner assumption.

Okay I have done a very useful session with Snake skin he’s really good at giving me a skilled breakdown of how I’m doing. Also working on my inner game, we have been looking at reframing a lot of my beliefs.

This list is basically after a daygame session with him these are some new conclusions I have come to and his responses:

1: Skill level makes a big arse difference

True – BUT, the actual STRUCTURE I am applying is pretty much the same as what I’ve taught you – so the “difference” just lies in doing enough sets to get a gut level “feel” for how to calibrate – and a technical intuitive fluidity, which just comes from automating this stuff – again thru practise – that’s all it is 😉

Also, any anxiety, pessimism/apathy or “moral” issues you have with Daygame subskills basically “dissolves” as you get more experiences of “some girls LOVE this shit ;)”

A stoical acceptance that you actively EMBRACE the likelihood of a few hundred turdy or can’t quite close approaches to LEARN the CALIBRATION & smoothness, makes “rejection” seem pretty irrelevant – as long as you TRY to employ the skills, decisiveness, calibration & leading/dominance in all sets, the outcome of any individual interaction – however scary or frustrating it may be in the MOMENT – is ALL good – either you close, or learn, or get more smooth/brave – so the “successes” are sort of an incidental “side effect” of the OVERALL process.

2: Age seems to be less of a factor

Yeah! When I started to go grey it bugged me, but it soon became apparrent it makes me MORE attractive – girls DON’T think the same way as guys! Their brains scan for different qualities – including maturity – the most make-or-break male quakity is TAKING ACTION, not age/weight/looks etc. It helps but only say 20%

1: This will be a drawn out awkward interaction

Sometimes it will! BUT, you’ll still be learning what works/doesn’t, and even if it ends badly, she WON’T remember you in a month – doubtless she’s been approached before – if you don’t close, you are just another guy – this is a GOOD thing!, sort of “safely anonymous”. I calculate there are about 70,000 really hot girls in London – so we can afford to fuck up a LOT sets while we practise. Awkward in the moment maybe, but no pain no gain. AFTER a clunky set, just consider a few things you could have done DIFFERENTLY – eg did you fail to capitalise on a topic that came up in conversation, and be interesting or cocky or sexual etc – if so, just work out what you SHOULD have said! Sort of “edit” what happened in your memory, as it you’d played it better, and averted the awkwardness.

X2: Women will not be attracted to me

That Camille bird liked you, at least in the moment – did you try to phone her? Sometimes they need a bit of a nudge even if they like you. It’s just the mans job – that’s the deal 😉

3: Women will pity me and find me pathetic.

Tall Financially secure, artistic actor 😉  so if she DOES pity you, perphaps SHE is the one with distorted perception 😉 ALSO, in each fresh approach on another girl – you make a NEW first impression – so if you DO get a bit of a pity-pathetic type vibe off her, just FAKE a bit more self belief on the NEXT approach (talk slower, better eye contact, body language) – basically remember YOUR positive qualities as you open a new girl – if you cock your vibe up, SHE will miss out – so your effort to control your body and voice is for HER benefit, not yours.

4: Shes in a hurry / busy

Sometimes she is – but even a quick number close MAY meet you for a date if your vibe was warmed-up and awesome enough. Also, some “in a hurry” girls totally FORGET their previous plans once you approach & attract them. Also, if she’s in a hurry just frame this as BAD LOGISTICS – you are NOT being rude – it’s just bad luck. Also, thinking quickly and staying cool to TRY to glue a hurry girl to the spot with your game is EXTRA GOOD PRACTISE as they are harder to close than slow moving just floating about noting to do girls.

5. Talking about sexual things would be creepy

Its All a question of WHEN you do it! A calibration issue – sexualising things is done ONLY when you sense you have warmed her up enough with dominance, humour, comfort, passage of time etc – THEN, introduce sexuality in the THIRD PERSON, or thru INNUENDO – or sexual swearing “This club is FUCKING cool” etc, and GUAGE HER REACTION – if her body language perks-up keep rolling, but if she tenses-up, then back off the sex for half an hour and use other bits of your game. Maybe she wants you but it’s just a bit TOO SOON… game is basically about BALANCING risk taking with reading-HER-reaction. Yang plus yin – not a new concept 😉

Ok – that’s about it 😉 hope this helps – the way to use this email is basically to INTELLECTUALLY appreciate it, then go and actually game, and you’ll likely “FORGET YOURSELF” and click back into negative ways of viewing things – BUT, just try to be SELF AWARE of when this happens, and use your intellectual mind to “pull yourself back on track”, when your emotions go reactive in the moment. With practise this reprograms your expectations & perceptions – use logic to rewire your emotions, and ACTIONS…

Good luck – R

How to be successful at speed dating

Speed dating can be excellent fun and it’s definitely an effective way of meeting women. However speed dating does have a one major problem, the low quality of women. Beautiful women will get approached often in bar, in social settings, at work, they do not need to go to any kind of singles events. Also the type of men at these events are usually not confident enough to approach women in real life and since confidence is one of the main things that women find attractive then the men will be pretty low quality too.

Guy was suppose to be shy but I think I just made him look miserable!

The events are pretty much bottom feeder places. Having said that you can meet the occasional hot women, usually they are new in town and have no social group established yet. Good news is if you have even a little bit of game you can clean up.

Here are my top tips:

Pick a big or niche event:

Most speed dating events are about 12 guys / 12 girls. This doesn’t give you a good chance of meeting someone you fancy + click with. The bigger the event the more chance you have. Also if your into wine go to a wine tasting speed dating event, if you Hindu go to a Hindu speed dating event, if your into kinky sex go to a kinky sex speed dating event, instantly improves the likely hood your meet someone you like.

Have some good questions prepared:

For a good conversations, try to avoid job, where they come from, how old are you. Questions should be playful and get to know the person rather than their statistics.

I like questions like these:

• “What book that you read before the age of 16 had the biggest impact on you?”
• “If you won the super lottery and more money than you could ever need, after you’d done all the partying and settled down. What would you spend the rest of your life doing?”
• “Have you ever killed a man?”

Playfully tease women and have a go at them, try to avoid compliments.

Have the Frame that speed dating is cool:

Most people at these events will be at least a little bit ashamed of being there. Most people will pretend that they are there because they are supporting a friend or something. This is a miserable frame, to stand out take the frame of ‘Speed dating is a great Idea, I’m cool for doing this, I’m doing it because it’s efficient and I’m a busy and important person.’ don’t fall in the ‘I embarrassed, Isn’t this a sad thing to be doing.’ frame. It’s very unattractive and if you think it’s cool you will put her at ease to feel okay about it to.

Get the number there and then:

Don’t wait for the system to match you up. It’s very weak, if you like a girl get her number on the day. It’s shows confidence and that you are more of an Alpha male. Tell her your not going to bother with the card and ask for her number out right.

Talk to the girls before the dates:

Usually their is a 30 minutes gap before everyone is sat down and asked to talk to each other. Don’t bother waiting, start talking to the women immediately. Alpha men don’t polity wait until someone they have paid tells them they can talk to women. Just do it.

Have fun:

Seriously if you just do this you will stand out head and shoulders above the rest.

5 Reasons Your Game Suck – Altitudes take

The following was a post from a private forum by a guy who goes by the alias of Altitudes. He does not sell any product or nor is he trying build some kind of guru celebrity status. He is just just a very sorted, intelligent, Alpha guy, with some crazy women skills, who has been very generous giving back to the community. 

This specific post really rang true with me  and it also highlights some of the worst parts of the ‘Pick up’ community.

—- Follow is the orginal post —

5 Reasons Your Game Sucks – My Take….

In my opinion, the following issues affect women in their love-life difficulties just as much as they affect men in their dealings with women.

Here are my thoughts:

You’re not in it for the girls; your main motivations are different and unhealthy:

A whole host of factors can motivate why someone feels compelled to focus on their relations with girls. It has often been remarked that lots of guys are probably here because they seek approval and acceptance from other men more than anything else. Others do it to consolidate their reputation as a coach of some kind. Others are deeply insecure about themselves and seek constant revalidation of their attractiveness in the feedback of other people.

Ironically, guys are often quick to dismiss a girl who has slept around a lot as clearly doing it because they are insecure; but then they never make the connection that those problems are coming up in their own self-image and ultimately underlie their behaviour in chasing women all the time.

On the other hand; the guys that are happy and big womanisers usually just really love girls. Once Ryanimal mocked someone on here about this: he stated that the guy had ‘lost his way’ because he wanted a ‘skillset’ more than he wanted a girlfriend. Lost his way indeed.

You’re generally a failure in life; but think that you can quickly get good with girls:

The classic ‘quick fix’ seeker. Often we cannot see the woods for the trees. We often cannot see that each area of our lives affects the other areas. These are the guys that for some illogical reason will not take the holistic approach. Always looking for the low-effort and self-evidently ineffective alternative.

Usual scenarios:
– Guy has shit job… and seeks cheeky lines to diffuse the situation when girls inevitably ask ‘so, what do you do?’
– Guy has no friends… and rationalises to himself that he is an ‘introvert’ or something, or if he’s on here he’ll ask about ‘sarging solo’.
– Guy has no passions or interest in life… and asks dating coaches how to be an interesting person.
– Guy generally looks and dresses like shit… and blames girls for being ‘shallow’, in spite of wanting a girlfriend with blonde hair and huge tits. The time he could use in a gym, learning about a healthy diet or understanding a bit about fashion is squandered in favour of bickering over ‘do looks matter?’ on the internet.

On the other hand, guys get good at game when they have a pattern of success in their lives. The ones who progress quickly are usually prepared to take a hard look at themselves and address things over a longer timescale.

You cannot take a pragmatic approach to situations:

This is the problem of assigning an emotional meaning to all or most occurrences, and then wallowing in defeat… While not realising that this creates a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Pragmatically speaking, if you approach a girl she’ll either be into you or she wont. THAT IS IT.

The kind of mental baggage that guys allow to grow on top of this is truly astounding, and it clouds their vision, thus ruining their interactions and making their game lousy.

Commonly, guys will see everything as some sort of indictment on their ‘value’ (whatever that means) – and consequently they bumble around like a house of cards ready to fall.

I could say to a guy, ‘Look mate, all you need to think is she’s hot, that’s one for me!… and then get on with it!’ And let whatever happens happen. Immediately people will retort, ‘oh, but it isn’t as simple as that for everyone!… But what if this?…. What if that?!’… and so the guy will nourish his own self-sabotage.

The guys who are able to take a pragmatic approach to situations aren’t invincible, but they are capable of stepping away from their emotions, looking at things objectively, and calming themselves down. This can apply to all sorts of scenarios. Isn’t the ability to do this one of the defining features of being a man? I think so. So do the women when they say cryptic things like ‘where have all the real men gone?!’… Did it ever occur to you that women want you to be confident and successful and not a nervous wreck?!

You’re too self-absorbed to empathise with and connect with other people:

This point is very similar to my last point. It follows on from it really.

Most people are too wrapped up in their own nonsense for their own good. When you’re got more issues that The Beano, it is very hard to concentrate on much else; like the person you fantasise about sleeping with for instance. If you cannot pay attention to a girl enough, you’ll have no natural and instinctive feeling for what to do.

When you see the guys that are good with girls, they absolutely DO NOT make it look hard, do they?! It looks effortless when a cool guy has a hot girl all over him. This is the by-product of being attuned to what is going on rather than having a racing mind speeding up its own demise with paranoia.

The sensible person can see the human condition for the joke that it really is. Everyone is too worried about their own insecurities to pay much attention to yours. Nobody sees the irony of this! If you can really get this, see how funny it is, and then just step out – you’re basically flying above the race.

There is no passion in your experience of and attitude towards sex:

Self consciousness (as described above) is rampant when it comes issues of sex. And this seriously hinders the pursuit of sex. Our emotions are contagious, and, well… Good luck trying to seduce that girl that you’ve just made self-conscious and frightened.

Sex ought to be understood for what it is.

It is part of the miracle of new life, and the most fun two (or more) people can possibly have together.*

Why then, do many guys have little passion or excitement for it? I think for many, sex becomes nothing more than a bodily function. In the same way that a urinal is the preferred receptacle for piss; a girl becomes the preferred receptacle for cum – preceded by mediocre sex and followed swiftly by sleep!

Girls hate that. Your game will suck if you cannot create an exciting and non-judgemental atmosphere for girls to have sex with you in.

THE END. DON’T ARGUE WITH ME…. BECAUSE I’M RIGHT.

How to offer value

One of the theory of the to do with PUA theory. Is that you have people who offer value in a social situation and people who suck value. This makes sense however their isn’t much specifics about what value is.

So these were my thoughts on ways a person can offer value:

Raising a person status by association
Sometime being around someone can provide you with a certain amount of status. People want to have a group of friends, who are beautiful, rich, interesting and famous. Because it reflects well on them.

Raising someone status directly
You can provide value by ‘complimenting’ people. This is often done badly and you often lower your own value by doing lowering your value (by making you seem needy), which is a killer for pick up. Also lots of people are not comfortable with complement so it make them feel awkward. Often done best by singing someone praises to other people.

Allowing someone to be comfortable beta
Okay this is one I’m not sure about, this sort of comes from my thinking about, some people are simple not within their comfort zone being in charge. Being the Alpha male for example is hard work and requires risk (or at least perceived risk). Most people do not want the responsibility of being in charge, say you suggest a restaurant/ bar and it sucks, it’s the Alpha fault. Most people are glad when someone else takes this responsibility out of their hands. In extreme cases I’ve even known people who have trouble deciding on drinks, and like other people to decide.

Providing entertainment
This one is big one in the PUA community the concept of being the person that keep everyone entertain, be it magic, jokes, stupid dancing …

Providing excitement
I think this is similar to entertaining, but it’s more about moulding the situations. Being the person who strikes up conversation with strangers, gets you to go on stage with the band, get you to try drugs. The person who makes an evening exciting, the difference is an entertaining person would make a night in a pub pleasant; an exciting person would turn it into a pub crawl on stolen golf carts, with strippers.

Providing security
I think this is a bit like allowing someone to be comfortable beta. I have friends who are trained marshal artists. When I’m out with them, I’m activity more calm in some circumstances. Just their presence makes me worry less about external threats (even though I haven’t been in a fight for over a decade now).

Providing connection
Human are social creature and they crave connection with other, someone to listen to them an audience, the need to feel like they are interesting and important, if someone spends too long on their own they tend to go a little stir crazy.

Teaching them something
Like when you are out with a PUA trainer they are providing value because they can show you how to do something. That is of value to you.

Providing a social circle
Something that people can offer as value is access to a social circle, the ability to invite people to parties and introduce them to fun people.

Providing things
This would ability to provide things to for people as a way of offering value. For example, buying rounds of drinks, giving people lifts, buying flowers so on. Sometime it can be slightly less money orientated like having a flat so that people can meet, being the designated driver so on. I works in the same way though as complimenting people if done badly it can lower people view of you are you seem beta and subservient, plus it cost money.

Providing help
This is a little like teaching them something, but sometimes it just doing things for them. I have a friend who boring as hell, but man can he roll one hell of a spliff, in the right circumstance he in the most important person in the room. Being the person who knows there way around London’s hotspots is often a value raiser.

Providing a good positive vibe
If you hang out with miserable negative people they bring you down, if you hang out with happy positive people you feel more happy and positive. Even without being entertaining or exciting just a positive carefree vibe is in way providing value.

Provides good sex
I dont really need to explain this one

Good genes
On some in of unconscious level we are all slightly driven by the ability to get hold of the best genes to pass on to our next generation. So we value interaction with people with good gene slight more with percieve bad genes.

Style on what makes a guy attractive

This is what style list as qualities that make a guy attractive.

LOOKS: Well-groomed and standing out. Belonging to a tribe that she wants to be part
of, or at least visit.
SOLUTION: Stylist, female panel, hair person, clothes shopping

ADAPTABILITY: this is where humor and intelligence come in. (lt’s why uptight guys
don’t get laid.) lt’s her being able to introduce you to her friends/family for peer approval.
It’s where adventurousness, spontaneity, independence, risk{aking, and the ability to
handle new situations. Exciting to be around, in the moment. lt’s being able to be fun in
a club, mannered with her family, and a totaljerk with your male friends. Quote: “The
soecies that does not adaDt is doomed to die.”
SOLUTION: Travel. Cultural knowledge. Exposure to new things and unfamiliar
situations

STRENGTH: Defined not as physical strength, but the ability to protect her. Thjs is done
traditionally through either money or muscle, but through decisiveness, non-wussiness,
useful practical knowledge, an ability to “take care of things,” taking charge,
assertiveness, living in your own reality, and the ability to make her feel safe. Also moral
strength and values (good or bad but strong) that make her feel safety and comfort.
Loyalty.

SOLUTION: Become self-correcting in your response patterns.
You are constantly being tested for your ability to do this for a chick. So here’s a small
checklist:
‘1. Make decisions. Don’t ask her what she wants, though it’s okay to find out her preferences.
2. Don’t change your opinion based on what she thinks in order to please her or get rapport.

lt’s only okay to change them if she persuades you logically.
3. Know your environment. Know how to get places, what to do, what’s cool.
4. Be an effective communicator, able to get others (waiters, door-people, taxi drivers) to respond.
Be seen as the leader of a group and other men.
Have rules.
Stortelling: about protecting a girlfriend from a threat cause it’s your nature,
about ejecting someone from your life for an infraction because you have a “zero
tolerance policy.”
In situations where people are confused or indecisive, take charge.
Not tolerating bad behavior from her or letting her manipulate her like she does
other men or her father.


VALUE: Standing out. What makes you different than all the other guys she should
meet… being interesting, being excellent… entertaining.. . chick crack… “women want to
learn from men”… “being an authority over her world”…leader of men. Also includes
external value: social proof, leader of your group, being seen as attractive to others.
SOLUTION: Learning DHV routines, learning to play social proof like an
instrument, making sure she’s bending to meet you on your reality and note vice
versa

EMOTIONAL CONNECTION: Chemistry, emotional connecting, having a quality that
makes her feel emotionally excited and focused around you. Finding yourself laughing
together or saying things at the same time. Commonalities. Can also include emotional
qualities like being compassionate, caring, sensitivity, having a tender side. Confessing
mutual deep secrets you’ve never told anyone before.
SOLUTION: Style’s EV, vulnerability story, NLP, “me too” tactics, letting her
Drotec

GOALS: This is not defined by what you do, but by what you’re capable of doing.
Success isn’t necessary, just a clear path towards it. Goals. A dream. Hunger for life.
And not just ambition but potential. Women as A&R scouts. Possibly creativity. Stability.
SOLUTION: identify your identity today, where you want to be five years from
now, how you’re going to get there

AUTHENTICITY: This means that who you present yourself to be on the outside must
be the same as who you are on the inside. lt’s a person who is happy with and likes
himself. However, real life has contradictions, and that’s okay. lt’s also accepting your
imperfections because they make you human,. And having a duality or a contradiction
or complications make you more compelling and rich as a peBon.
SOLUTION: This is the last step. lt’s true inner game. lt’s mastery. And it’s the
most attractive of all these qualities

SELF-WORTH: Confidence, which is high status behavior (cocky funny, non-
neediness). Not being afraid to take up space in the world or someone else’s time. “l
just bench pressed the world.” Sense of worthiness. Lack of desperation. Having
opinions and sticking to them, even if they conflict with hers, but at the same time not
being afraid to admit you’re wrong if you are.
SOLUTION: Success. Affirmations. Self-correcting body language and frame
control